Having said all that, my 2007 officially started this past weekend in San Antonio.  I played for a local team called the Titans and we won the tournament.  I pitched 4 games and I’m sore in parts of my body that I didn’t even know existed.   Still, it was good to kick the rust off and get ready.  Thankfully, my back held up so far and I’m healthy.  Knock on wood.

I’m thinking about making a “question” section on here for people to email questions that I can answer via the blog. It’s amazing how many of the same or similar questions I get from various people. Maybe I can just do a mass answer with everyone. Email questions to me and I’ll do my best to answer them.

No, my crocodile tears are about the end of the 2006 season.  It’s past Labor Day now and time to concentrate on my fantasy football team and Pittsburgh Steelers.  About this time last year, I was glued to the TV every night with hopes of a Cleveland Indians victory but, I’ve given up that pipedream this year.

The ‘06 season was tough, on many fronts.  My team underachieved for our abilities, and that climaxed at the World tournament through my own bad pitching.   My worst fear became reality: I wouldn’t be ready for the World’s after taking the most crucial part of the year off with my back injury.   I absolutely was NOT in pain while pitching at the end, just didn’t have myself where I needed to be in order to give my team my best. So, it’s not exactly breaking my heart to see the season end.   Having said that, I’m not looking forward to month after month without games.   Doing lessons and clinics all winter keeps my heart and mind on the game but, it doesn’t do anything for the competitive spirit.

I did get asked to head back to New Zealand for the winter season, October to March.  Do you have any idea how tempting that is?   I haven’t been down under for softball in 6 years and it’d be wonderful to see my old friends again.  Not to mention, avoiding winter and playing softball.   But, sadly that little thing called “Life” is in the way from doing that.  I only wished I could’ve appreciated it more when I was carefree going between USA and New Zealand, staying in summer, playing ball, and having the time of my life. I thought it would never end.   “Youth is wasted on the young”.

Instead, I’ll spend all winter thinking about what could’ve been in ‘06 and try to keep myself busy.  With clinics planned from Hawaii to the Virgin Islands already this winter, I guess life isn’t so bad.   Just remind me not to pet the sting rays when I’m swimming.

In my first start of the tournament, I felt like I had picked up right where I left off last year.  I had all 3 pitches (rise, drop and change up) going with pinpoint control and a lot of velocity.  Basically, I felt great.   We won the game easily and the other team had only 1 baserunner… a bunt single in the 4th inning.   I think that was my 8th career 1 hitter at the World Tournament… I always seem to give up one.  Oh well.   Anyways, I felt great and was ready to take on the next team the following day.

When the next day came, it became one of those where I wished I hadn’t gotten out of bed.  Absolutely NOTHING I threw had any movement and I didn’t feel like I had 1/2 of the velocity from the previous day.  Bang, bang, bang… 3 Homeruns in the first 2 innings had my team down 4-0.  I was then taken out of the game.  Then, to make matters worse… my team came back and scored 4 runs later.  We ended up losing the game rather badly but, I lamented that night about how I never seemed to get run support then, when I do get it… I can’t hold the other team down.  That was a bitter pill to swallow!    That loss put us into another game the same night vs. Czech Republic National team.   I started that game again and felt like a whole new person from earlier in the day.  I had snap on all the pitches and they were moving away from their bats with ease.   Taking a 5-0 lead into the 5th inning with a lot of K’s…. the wheels came off.   All of the sudden, no matter what I did.. everything I pitched was hit.  I mean EVERYTHING.   It wasn’t as though they were hitting screamers off the fence or Homeruns out of the park.. they were just simple basehits.  We had the odd error and walk thrown in too but… the bottomline was, what I had in the first 5 innings left very quickly.   Once again, given a lead I could not hold.   That loss knocked us out of the tournament.   I almost had to call Dr. Phil to get some mental health advice.

I still had a pretty good year, all things considered.  Despite battling through my back injury I threw well.   I don’t know my stats but, I’m sure my ERA was quite low and I had more wins than losses but, none of that matters right now.  I’m sure I could find 100 excuses for my performance; back injury, umpires, etc. But none of that would be true.  I simply didn’t do the job I was supposed to do… hold the other team down to 1 less run than we score.

About the only thing keeping my sanity in all of this was after the games, regardless of if I pitched my best game or worst game of the tournament… Alexander would come running into the dugout yelling “Hi Da Da” and give me a big hug when the game was over.   He couldn’t care less if I pitched well or not… he wanted to run, play and have fun.  It kind of makes me feel silly about being depressed over a softball game when there is so much more that is REALLY important.

It’s Thursday Aug 10.  That means tomorrow starts the crown jewel of men’s fastpitch softball, The ISC World Tournament.  ISC stands for International Softball Congress.  And for men’s fastpitch, this is more important than anything else.

The ISC tournament is a club tournament for club teams.  30 teams from across North America and 2 from outside North America compete.  The US based club teams are full of international players, virutal all star teams from National team players worldwide.  The #1 ranked team in the world is from Wisconsin, and I believe they have 3 Americans on their entire roster.  That’s not a misprint.. 3.  The rest are from New Zealand, Canada, Australia, and Argentina.  The core group are New Zealanders and this team is arguabley the best ever assembled in men’s softball history.   US club teams like this require sponsorship of anywhere from 1/4 to 1/2 a million dollars per year.   And, there are about 5 teams in this category… then there’s everyone else.   Similar to how the #1 complaint of baseball is.. big market teams are the only ones playing in October.. it’s the same on the final day of the ISC.   It virtually always comes down to the same 5 teams in all the major invitationals and world championship.

This promotes 2 types of teams:  those that want the challenge of playing the best, and those that are disgusted by the structure of it and refuse to participate.   No matter what, there is always going to be a dominant team.   I would never say that my team stands NO chance against this team because you never know.  I just pitched (and lost) a 2-1 heartbreaker to the world’s #2 ranked team last week.  Anything can happen, especially at tournament time.   But, it’s very rare that the cream doesn’t rise to the top in the end.   These teams are like machines and are built for winning.   While I can hold my team in a game against anyone, the reality is we don’t have the firepower to score runs against these top guns.

This year is the 60th anniversary of the ISC World tournament, and it’s being held in Kitchener Ontario.  As I said, for men’s fastpitch fans, players and teams… this is the equal to the Women’s World Cup, ISF World tournament and Olympics rolled into one.  In fact, some players actually turn down opportunities to play for their National teams because certain events conflict with the ISC world tournament.   That’s not a misprint.. sometimes Canada and USA go to the Pan Am games WITHOUT their top men’s players because the ISC takes priority.

I can only hope to keep my team in games and have a good showing.  We are shooting for a top 10 finish but, based on our draw, that’s not going to be an easy feat.   If the gods smile on us, and we win our first 2 games… we’ll run right into the #1 team in the world.   And if the good Lord owes you any favors and you’d be willing to share, we’ll need his help.

Fastpitch, at it’s highest level, is a low scoring game.  It’s not very often that 2 of the top teams playing will result in a mercy rule game.   It does happen on occassion but, that’s not the norm.  But, my team has the hardest time scoring runs when I pitch.  It’s almost comical. In fact, the running joke on the team is “You throw shutouts and we’ll tie them!”

I’m not sure where it is but, there is a line there that separates the mentality of a pitcher from these 2 thoughts:  1. I need to throw my best to keep my team in the game.   And #2. it doesn’t matter how well I pitch, we are not going to score anyway.   Personally, I don’t know where that line is.  It’s easy for anyone to say that thought #2 is flat out wrong and anyone who believes that is a quitter.  It’s not true.   They don’t understand.  Wanting to win is what drives many people.  Ultimately, all people remember are wins and losses.   The majority doesn’t care that it was a close game, most people just want to know who won, who lost.

The only solice in this is keeping the head up that those who know and understand the game can tell the difference.  And you as a pitcher can tell the difference.   It’s not as if teammates are striking out on purpose and don’t want to score runs.  On the contrary. But, that sometimes doesn’t cushion the blow of a 1-0 defeat.

On top of all of this, most pitchers like batting.  Yet, the higher one goes in their career, the less likely they are to get to bat.   Hardly seems fair, huh?   And it cuts like a knife to see the DH struck out for the 3rd time with runners in scoring position during the 7th inning.

So what’s the solution?  Well, there isn’t one.  It takes self control and discipline to keep one’s chin up.   While it doesn’t seem like it at the time, even a 1 run loss is a great game.  It may take a few years but, eventually I can look back and smile.. remembering a good game.   Of course, if I was batting, we’d win on my Homerun but that’s another blog topic.

The dates change annually (this year it was July 21-23) but, it’s always the fourth weekend of July: Bob Walsh Memorial Classic Tournament.   It’s held in Allentown PA and it attracts the top teams in North America.   My team opened with Orillia Riversharks, of Orillia Ontario ranked #2 in the entire world.   This team is loaded with great pitching and a batting line up that is hard as nails through and through.   Our next game… Kitchener Ontario, ranked #4 in the world.   Yikes.

All things considered, I threw ok.  We lost to Orillia 3-1 but, the score doesn’t tell the full story.  2 of their runs were solo home runs… we out hit them 5-3.. and we left about 5 guys in scoring position.   It’s hard to do that in games like this, great teams capitalize on everything.  We simply didn’t execute or get the big hits when we needed.    The next game against Kitchener Ontario wasn’t as successful, we lost 4-0.   We gave them 2 runs in the first on a defensive miscue and some very very suspect umpire calls.  Then, in the 5th inning I gave up my 3rd home run of the day.   A 2 run shot putting the team out 4-0, which is where it ended.   Regardless of how many runs given up, we aren’t going to win unless we score.   But, as strange as it sounds… apon thinking about it, I’m almost relieved I gave up the 2 run HR in the 2nd game.  I’d hate to think we lost to a great team by simply giving them the game.   I’d rather the team ‘earn it’.

This was our last games before the ASA Men’s Major Nationals in August, then it’s off to the ISC World tournament the following week.   All in all, I’m not too disappointed in my pitching.  I think I’m on the right track and I still have time before I need to be at my best.   With luck, I’ll get there before it’s too late.

I’m flying to Allentown PA today.  Generally, flying to a tournament is no big deal and something I do 12 times per summer but this one is special.  Why?  Because it’s my first time traveling and will be my first real games since my injury.

The is a real balancing act I’ll have to do for the next couple weeks.  You see, the World tournament is in August (Kitchener Ontario Canada).  Like most teams and pitchers, I spend the summer preparing for that event.   It’s not that other tournaments are meaningless but, in reality they are used to prepare myself for the end of the year.   I’d rather have my worst games in June/July than in August when it REALLY counts.   So, the season for me is a slow climb to the top of a mountain.  At the top of that mountain is the world tournament.  I need to be in peak condition physically and mentally for it, and that usually happens through the course of a season.  This year is different.

I’ve missed almost 5 complete weeks of the the summer with this injury.  I’ve now got 3 weeks to make up for the 5 I’ve missed.   In these 3 weeks, I need to get my body into game condition.. be able to pitch multiple games and/or extra inning games (sometimes multiple times) and have the self confidence that I’m ready to face the best.   These tasks are hard enough when someone is 100% healthy.  But, there’s a tremendous amount of added pressure coming off a pretty serious injury and being sidelined for weeks.

Unfortunately there’s no way to make up for lost time.  I’ll have to work through it all without doing too much and re-injuring myself.    Working through it and doing too much is a contradiction sometimes.   For the next several weeks I’m going to fine that line and hope I don’t cross it.

As I said, I do appreciate everyones kind words and emails.  But, also keep my friend Doug Gillis in your thoughts and prayers.  Doug owns one of the (if not THE) best pitching schools in the country and he suffered a stroke recently.   He’s doing very well and is expected to make a solid recovery.   He even showed up at a tournament in Canada this past weekend (July 4th weekend) in Canada.  He didn’t play but, his appearance a week removed from the stroke was an inspiration to everyone.   While it’s hard to see such things as strokes coming.. Doug is only 41 years old so NOBODY saw that coming!    Anyway, get well soon Doug.   I’m looking forward to pitching against you soon.

This back injury is something else.  Right now, as I sit here… there is a pulsing pain running through my body.   The Doctor is recommending rest, treatment, and physical therapy.   Surgery is a last resort.   In moments like this, it’s hard to see the positive side of it.   It’s not a life threatening injury, in fact I’ll probably be able to pitch this year… late in the year.  I can still move around and do day to day things, etc.  So, there are many things that I’m fortunate for.    But, like most people… I tend to dwell on the negative.  I’m going to miss an entire month of the season.    Not only that but, July is an important month.  Our National and world tournaments are held over the first 2 weeks of August so… July is used as preparation for that.  It kills me to wait all winter to play ball, then have this happen.

The worst part is, the back isn’t like other parts of the body.   If it were my arm, I could put it in a sling and not use it for a while.   But, the back is something constantly in use. So, how does one rest that?   I have coaching lessons, house to maintain, etc.  Not to mention the most important thing:  I have several scheduled wrestling matches with Alexander.   WWE Wrestlemania has NOTHING on our bouts.   And, I really believe he smells injury and knows right where to attack…. without mercy.   But somehow, I don’t mind that pain as much!